beckylou_who's Revelife

Hm.

Sat, 23 Aug 2008 19:19:31 GMT

So there's a guy that I think has a crush on me. I'm happily taken, but it's hard to tell because of the distance that I mentioned earlier. He's kind of cute, but definitely not my type. I'm kind of a touchy-feely person with my friends, and I feel like he needs a good friend since he's an incoming freshman and he doesn't really have many friends. I want to be a good friend to him, but I feel like I have to hold back parts of the kind of friend I want to be just because I don't want him to get the wrong idea about how I feel about him. If that's not too confusing. xD

I asked my friend to ask him whether or not he has a crush on me, and then I plan on talking to him about it, but I'll have a hard time finding the words to say. I know that I want to tell him that I want to be a friend to him, but I don't know how to tell him not to take me the wrong way without sounding weird...

Advice is Nice :]

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 04:28:05 GMT

Soo I've gotten myself into a bit of a pickle. It's happened before, and I don't know how to keep it from happening.

I love my boyfriend very much, but I only see him on weekends, so I'm basically alone the majority of the time. This pulls my focus away from him and towards other guys, and this worries me because it wouldn't be worth it for me to screw up something so great for almost nothing. It seems like it's going to be like this for a while now, at least until I go to college. Then the separation might be even more, and the temptation will be even more...

I'll get these very minor crushes on boys and I'll wonder about "What would happen if..." situations. I'll compare them to my boyfriend and think of all the ways that they're better than he is, but when I'm with him I only think of ways that he is so much more awesome than they are. Help!

What is the best way to get others to respect you?

Tue, 05 Aug 2008 22:12:47 GMT

I don't know how I would go about getting people to respect me. Getting respect isn't really my goal with most people, since the people I want to respect me already do. Otherwise I guess I just respect everyone and hope that that earns their respect back. After all, you can't help but respect people with honorable intentions, even if you don't really like them.

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Do you think you are (or you would be) a better parent than your own parents? Why or why not?

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 20:35:34 GMT

Well, there's definitely such a thing as a "bad parent," but I refuse to rate my parents or ask for better. They've given me the tools to succeed and I'm on a very good path for having a really great life. I can't say that they've done a bad job with parenting at all. They've been able to provide for me for over 16 years, and they've loved me more than anything. I love them, and I don't always agree with some of the things they say and do, but that's okay because they're my parents and I wouldn't have it any other way. (:

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UPDATE: Spread the prayers!

Thu, 03 Jul 2008 17:55:59 GMT

Looks like I have a thing for follow-up entries!
The original entry is about three or four entries back.

You'll never guess what happened with my boyfriend and his pastor! He got the boot. Or, more specifically, the pastor felt the need to "dissolve the partnership." I read the e-mail, and it was funny because he spelled lots of things wrong and used some poor grammar. xD That kind of stuff makes me laugh when they act like they're so much better than someone.

It upsets us both because he needed the money to pay for his next year of college, and it's going to be a bit of a rough time. It's a relief to no longer have to deal with the pastor, though. I don't know how to feel towards the pastor now, although I'll do my best to treat him with the utmost respect and kindness, I don't know if I should feel bad for him for not being able to handle the situation and just dropping his music minister because of his need to be controlling, but I know that I can't really be upset about his actions because I can't hold grudges.

Another thing that I'll have to deal with now is finding time to spend with Josh. He goes to that church and I probably won't be going there any more due to recent events, but I really want to be there for him because his mom has a really awful case of cancer and she's got only a little while longer to live. I want him to know that I care about him, but I don't know what I should do to keep in contact. He's kind of awkward to talk to on the phone, but he's really fun to hang out with. I'll definitely need my boyfriend's help with this.

Right now I'm in keyboarding and all of my assignments are finished. I'm really good with computers, so everyone is asking me for help (sometimes even the teacher) and I just got through with running between three or four different people asking me questions. xD I didn't know I would be so occupied today!

BRIEF UPDATE to previous entry: Ah! Refreshing!

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 16:49:17 GMT

Do you remember the person that I was talking about from my keyboarding class who seemed irresponsible and not like a Christian who gave me a new perspective on who he was? He made some... irresponsible decisions and got kicked out of the class. There are these strict rules that you can't be absent more than twice, and one tardy counts for one-half of an absence. Incidentally, he was absent the first day of class and then he was late three more times about a week and a half into the course. $250 down the drain for him. That stinks.

He sat next to me, we didn't talk much, but he would ask me the occasional question about what we were doing. He was nice, and I feel bad that he had to leave, but I still realized that my initial impression wasn't entirely inaccurate.

People say smoking is a choice. But if you’re addicted to something, doesn’t that rule o

Mon, 30 Jun 2008 16:43:27 GMT

I guess there are a lot of choices involved with smoking.

The first choice you have is whether or not to start. That's easy now, since we know all the bad things it does to your body and such, and people know what they're getting into when they try it. However, many people that smoke do so because they started a long time ago, when they didn't know the ramifications as well as they do now. If you ask me, anyone who started smoking in the last three or four years doesn't have much common sense.

Another choice to make is whether or not to continue smoking. It is an addiction, but it is also a choice if you make it one. The brain is so powerful and complex, why shouldn't you have the brain power to quit? Sure, it messes with your emotions, but what's having another smoke going to help? We all have the power to resist caving under the pressure, but even if you can't, you made the choice to try instead of doing nothing. Now you can make the choice to continue trying to quit or just giving up all together until you run out of money and taxes make the choice for you.

I've never smoked, so if you're reading this as a smoker who's trying to quit, I'll save you some time and tell you that YES, I know, it's NOT that easy. Plus, with God on your side, you can handle anything. (:

You can choose to ask Him for help and He will surely answer!

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Spread the prayers!

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 03:33:56 GMT

"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.
The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." - James 5:16

We are none of us righteous, but because of Jesus we are seen as righteous in God's eyes. (Thank the Lord!) The power of prayer is an amazing thing, especially when we pray in Jesus' name. You can't just pray and then tack on "...in Jesus' name." Praying in His name is praying something that He would pray, and thus striving to be like Jesus and have that kind of connection with our awesome God. When we keep our prayers to ourselves, sure, they're effective, but when people join together and pray it's so much more amazing. The reason I'm posting about this is that there has come a reason for me to ask for prayer.

My boyfriend is a music minister at a church, and the pastor has become very controlling and it's frustrating both of us. He treats him like his puppet, giving him none of the creative liberties that make the true worship in the church. We're becoming very frustrated and we don't really know how to handle the situation. The church is small and mainly populated with older people (60 or older). There are a few younger people, but not too many. We have trouble relating to some of the messages that he gives, and sometimes his ways seem very disorganized or we don't really feel spiritually fed. The services are fine, but we don't really like the Bible studies much, so we like to go to the back room and read the Bible as like an independent study. Now he's making us go to the Bible study because he doesn't feel like we're being "good examples." He went so far as to say something along the lines of, "If it's a problem of maturity, then this may not be the job for you." That cut deep.

I would really like any help that I can get with just praying for him and our pastor so that they can handle this situation and that the pastor's heart may be softened. I pray that my boyfriend will be able to forgive the way that he has been treated and do his job to the best of his abilities.

Thank you, and God bless!

Ah! Refreshing!

Fri, 20 Jun 2008 22:20:19 GMT

It's always refreshing when you hear something positive about Christianity or something portraying themselves as Christians when you don't expect it. I know that we should always expect the best from people, but sometimes we get in such a rhythm that we expect "most people" to be non-Christian based on the actions of "most people." This is me using a lot of generalizations and stereotypes, which I hate, so I don't know why this situation stuck me this way.

This boy who seems kind of unnecessarily irresponsible sits next to me in my keyboarding class, and we've talked a little. I found out that he used to go to my school and he's taking the class for a graduation requirement, because he didn't get the credit while he was in school. I thought that he may have been in the cliques at my school that would always run their mouths and disrespect teachers, but it appears that I was wrong (thank goodness!). He's really nice and yesterday he was joking around, and someone was jokingly placing him in a position where he was saying that he was "divine." He stopped that there, saying, "Naw, there's only one 'divine'..." This pleases me.

He also has a friend (whose name I'm unsure of) who was telling him about a conversation she was having on the way to class about Christianity with a stranger. She was saying that he was asking her tons of questions and she felt totally on the spot, but that it was awesome. Maybe they're in a youth group together? (I need to stop making assumptions!)

So now I feel really bad about how I judged them both as people who didn't follow or didn't believe the word of God. I didn't know that I judged people so, mostly because I don't treat people any differently based on the way I see them. I didn't like seeing the dark side of my mind today, but I suppose it was something God knew had to be revealed to me. I guess I was feeling way too righteous for my own good!

If you could only be remembered with one word, what word would it be?

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 01:10:54 GMT

I want to be remembered by love. I don't want to leave a scratch on the broken home that is our world. I want to break it's windows and let the sunlight in. I want to love like nobody expects. When I die and people ask themselves what made my life so significant, I want them to say, "She shone her love on the world like no one I've ever known."

We've all heard it many times before, but when someone wrongs you, the best thing you can do is to show them all the love you posess. "If someone has to steal from you, then they must need it more than you do." Our world's philosophy is if someone slaps you, you should push them to the floor. Revenge. It would be so easy for so many good people to change others' lives by not just forgiving but by loving. Those who have turned to knocking others down for their own enjoyment are clearly lost and could be easily turned around by finally knowing that there is someone who loves them.

It reminds me of the story of the shooting at the Amish schoolhouse. A madman killed about 7 kids at the school, and although it was a very sad time for their families, they said that they forgave him and wanted to help him. Even though his life didn't change, everyone around them was shocked. How could they do such a thing? Did they SEE what just happened? Aren't they going to do something about it? Yes! They are going to break a window and shine some of the love that people haven't seen yet onto the crowds. They can't see it because they're covered in the dirt of our culture!

I don't just want to love those who love me. Anyone can do that. I want to find people on the streets who have nowhere to sleep and give them a bed and a meal. I want to spend time with the people that may anger me sometimes, and I want them to know that I care about them. I want to be one of the drivers in rush hour traffic who stops to help the poor guy on the shoulder with a flat tire.

I want to be remembered by love.

1 Cor. 13:13 "And these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love."

(It won't let me add it, so I'll just tell you! I'm listening to "If Everyone Cared" by Nickelback!)

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